Then one day last summer I started to add some running to my walking. Just making it to the next street, the next mailbox, etc. Runners are thin right? Once I could finally run a mile without having a near death experience, I started to fall in love. All I wanted to do was run. I loved it. It was a break away from my chaos of business, kids, and just life. It was just me, my thoughts and good old fashion physical stress relief. My body started changing and I was high. I worked my way up to 7 miles and thought I could take on the world. My mind raced with day dreams of running a half marathon and maybe one day a full. So I made a pact with myself that I would run a 1/2 marathon during my 35th year. I wanted to be in better shape than I was in my 20′s when I started my battle towards 40. Then a knee injury, winter and life happened. From one excuse to the next I found myself in the quitter seat, 4 months ahead and another 10 lbs heavier than my big weight. I was stressed with work, recessions and myself. I was getting depressed.

In January a friend asked me to join her team for the Ragnar Race. In a nutshell 12 crazy women run a 193 mile relay from Cumberland, MD to Washington DC. I think I was somehow caught in a vortex of complete insanity and desperation when I said yes. At this point I was heavier than I was when I started running last summer, I hadn’t run all winter (except from my desk chair to the kitchen) and my health was heading south….fast. So clearly, I was delusional when I said “sure, I can tackle 1/12 of 193 miles through the wilderness of the Appalachian Mountains, in the night, on trails and down city streets…why not?” So I started to run. Somehow I was in worse shape than I was last summer when I started. Maybe the additional 10 lbs, maybe the fact that my bum had been glued to my desk chair all winter. I guess I thought I would bounce right back into that 7 miles….NOT. I got frustrated…and angry. I gave up for a little bit. Then my friend (now trainer) gave me the list of races I had to run to prepare for Ragnar and reality hit. It was time to get serious or back out. It was time to face myself and make a decision. Either keep my promise to run a 1/2 marathon on my 35th year and get in shape…or continue my downward spiral of an unhealthy stress filled life.

So I run….a lot.

With having to start from scratch (not being able to run one mile straight) again and it has been a frustrating task. My calves are killing me, my stamina fails me at times, but I am seeing a difference and I am tackling my promise to myself. To top it all off…I freakin LOVE it. That whole “runners high” thing…it’s real…seriously…who knew? I buy running magazine’s (yes I am a dork), I get tickled when I see my running tan lines, I ask for new tennis shoes for Mother’s Day and a Garmin for my Birthday and even my super sore calves are a small token of all the hard work I have been doing. Added bonus…my body is changing and I am getting faster.

I turn 35 today, and I will run a 10k. I am signed up for several more races this year, including a half marathon and now I dream of running a full marathon and one day in my wildest dreams I will tackle a Tri.

So…to all of you suffering from “I can’t do this” and “I can’t do that”. You can…if you stick your mind to it and really want it.